i just saw a post that someone came out as demisexual
looking it up, it’s basically being attracted to personality not the physical
im just like… what?
like, why is this a thing? why is this a term? Some people are more drawn by physical, some are more drawn by the mental connection. The fact…
For one… that’s about the most uneducated rant I’ve ever seen. Here’s why someone might feel it’s necessary to “come out” as Demi. Take me for instance, I’m demisexual. And yes, I like sex, but no I cannot get it up until I am romantically, mentally, or emotionally attracted to the individual. Then everything functions as normal. This also means… I can like another guy and appear “gay” because what comes with demisexuality seems to be a lack of concern for whether the other individual is male or female.
There may be a preference but from what I’ve seen, a lot seem to be open to swinging both ways, which would seem bisexual to others. For a long time I mistook myself for bisexual because of that but felt something else was different with me because I did not function like other people do and am not able to find others physically attractive. You could say what’s the point of coming out if you’re bisexual? You could just fall in love with the opposite sex and have everyone think you’re straight. Yeah you could say that… but you’re not straight. We don’t choose who we fall in love with.
Also, being demisexual doesn’t mean you’re a prude. I happen to be a switch in the domination and submission lifestyle. Ie… I love kinky fucking sex. I also just can’t have it unless I form an emotional bond with someone. Then bring on the whips and chains and the naughty. That is not being a prude. Quite the opposite, I’m what people around here call a sexual deviant for the things I enjoy that would curl your toes in shock. It should also be noted that straight people can react just as badly to demisexuality as they do asexuality or homosexuality or bisexuality. If it’s not straight, it’s not great. My own parents, freaked the hell out when I told them. The very possibility that I could wind up with someone of the same sex was enough to send my parents into overdrive.
So don’t you sit there and say that it devalues your coming out when my own coming out was an unpleasant experience. That puts you on the end of devaluing my coming out, cause you know what, I have dated both guys and girls and I’m not straight. Just because you’re ignorant and don’t understand it, doesn’t mean it’s not legit. So why don’t you take your uneducated 1950s prejudice and stick it. You’re not the only person on this planet and you don’t get to decide for the rest of us what is valid and not valid.